 |
I am a people watcher. I love sitting in a public place and observing others. One of my favorite things is how people protect their personal space.
For instance, in an elevator everyone stands equidistant from each other:
Sometimes I like to mess with the elevator people a bit by shifting my position ever so slightly as to create imbalance and watch the subconscious chaos ensue.
Obviously karma has been watching and taken action to balance the world, because my off-spring have an entirely different take on the elevator scene.
Let me state right now that I don’t let my children ride elevators by themselves so this is purely hypothetical:
I have noticed this phenomenon at home.
Where ever I am the room is completely imbalanced.
Where ever I walk it is crowded.
Where ever I pee it is accompanied.
What a huge waste of square footage.
I am selling the house and moving into the minivan.
At least there they are strapped in an equidistant formation.
|
{ 79 comments… read them below or add one }
← Previous Comments
My daughter was about 12 and we sent her to a multi-day seminar. One of her homework assignments one evening was to step into an elevator and face everyone while saying, “I suppose you all are wondering why I called you here.”
I have tried this a couple of times since. I don’t know about karmic imbalance, but I have gotten bemused looks.
I think that if you wanted, you would make a good UFO-ologist. You have the mind and imagination for it. (And you should take this as a compliment, Holly. I don’t believe that I’ve ever seen that potential in anyone else.)
OMG! 52 comments! You sure hit a nerve. IT IS SO TRUE. I call it “mommy magnetic force.” You never studied it in Physics class, but it’s an undebatable truth. Until the kids turn 13. And then you actually repel them.
FANTASTIC!!! Come to think of it, there’s a heck of a lot of wasted space in my home, too. hmmm
So true!!! It is such a waste of space, I never thought of it that way before!
omg….I found this through Jennifer from Playgroups! I have to say I think I peed a little while reading! And I totally understand. We too could live in our minivan.
Thanks for the laugh!
Wow. I am SO glad I read this before Peanut reached Cheerio age! But tell me Texas Holly, what do I give instead?!
Hee hee…loved this post.
I say to round them all up and just send ‘em over to Bianca’s.
I mean, that’s what I would do.
The koy of being mom. You never ever get to have breathing room. Too funny and the diagrams made it better. So my life…. LOL
I also cannot spell. I meant to say JOy not koy. See it is all the oxygen deprivation of being encased by children all the time…run do not walk to the minivan.
I can’t do elevators…well not if anyone else is in there, I’ll wait eons if I have to, for an elevator ALONE. I can NOT deal with people popping my personal space bubble.
Heaven help me if I ever get stuck in one of those things!
*snort laughing!* I’m over from Angie’s space…thanks for the morning laugh…complete with diagrams…haw!
Well, my dog’s taken the place of my child (only child who is grown and lives across the land in Oregon)…and my hb, too – I have a big arse territorial space and people like to invade it (because I’m little, I suppose) whist I stand eyes-a-buggin and stiff and they don’t even notice when they grab onto me the subtle panic as I whisper “it’s only a hug, it’s only a hug…you’ve never seen this person in your life, but it’s only a hug”…erk.
This is so incredibly funny and so incredibly true!! Depsite the fact that I’m late and everyone else has said it already, had to comment and say that I’m laughing hysterically right now (as I try to push my three children into some other square foot of space besides the one I’m occupying).
You are very observant–I am lucky if I remember all my kids
This is why my husband says he passes gas so often…to give himself a little more room.
testing, testing, 1 2 3
HILARIOUS!!!
My first visit here(via Playgroups are no place for children’s shared reader items) and I am totally subscribing!
Ha! Looks like my house!
When I worked for the airlines, one of the things I trained was ‘Personal Space’. I had to go over each culture and the amount of space they need. Great post, you have a fan in me!
I miss my personal space.
Both of my kids crawled in bed with me this morning and were laying on TOP of ME. Not my husband. ME. What is with that?
We had a shepherd.
The shepherd *hearded* us.
We wouldn’t notice at first, then we’d realize that the dog had very gently shoved us into a corner and was sitting next to us looking very proud.
This was not a behavior we rewarded.
you know….I think this may have been one of the very first of your posts I ever read
I can’t remember personal space. Hubby’s space away from everyone is his workshop 10 ft by 20 ft building with insulation, electricity and a heat pump. If only I had thought to add running water a half bathroom when we had it rebuilt. Then we could call it the guest house. As long as guests did not mind sharing the space with various power tools.
HA!! Just replace “kids” with “dogs” and you are describing my life perfectly. Ever had a 50lb Australian Cattle Dog intently watch you pee? It’s a little unnerving.
Lol…so funny! Reading your blog sure made my day!
Thanks Alisa,
That is super sweet of you to say. Your comment made MY day!!!
hh
In regards to space, particularly in elevators I have noticed your theorem to be true. I work for a company in a 6 story building with 2 elevators and approximately 800 employees. The elevators were not made for the 800 employees, considering we lease the building. I ride the elevator several times a day. 1. To go to my office on the 4th floor, 2. To go to the 1st floor at 9:30 for a smoke break, 3. To ride back up to my office on the 4th floor at 9:40, 3. To go to lunch at 12:30 to the 1st floor, 4. To go to the basement to get snackage, 5. To go to my office…etc etc. Literally riding an elevator an approximate 8-10 times per day. I have notice unfailingly that every time I get on the elevator everyone, no matter if I know them or not, are equidistant in space. EVERY TIME. It does not matter if there are 2 people on the elevator or 8. Equidistant space is a must! Strange to thing, after reading your post how true this is. On the other side, my kids, who crowd my “space” no matter what
Hahahahhaha! Fig E is hilarious. I almost woke up my baby with my monkey laughter again!
“Wasted space in the house” comment comes out of my mouth every single day! But then older one innocently says ” the other rooms are boring without you” Argh!
← Previous Comments