june cleaver nirvana

Nine

Holly — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 03:51:58 +0000

You are nine.

Nine.

Nine years ago our family was born.

Your dark brown eyes opened.

Your brow furrowed.

Our lives changed.

Every day for nine years you have changed our lives…

with Ryan force.

Determined.

Passionate.

Steadfast.

There is no gray. There is no sneaking by. There is no making do.

You hold the world accountable.

And it will listen.

or else.

Happy Birthday Ryan!

Thanks for changing my life.

In these here parts Holly is known as Fierce Trapper …

Holly — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 16:22:00 +0000

Holly’s note: I am re-running this episode of Holly’s Animated Life that was posted on May 8, 2008 because it is my very favorite. It is the origination of my Texasholly social media profile picture. I have digitally enhanced the drawings and hope you enjoy it…

Holly lives in a suburban neighborhood of one of the United States of America’s largest cities.

Normally all God’s creatures do not congregate in a suburban neighborhood of one of the United States of America’s largest cities but Holly doesn’t live normally.

One day Holly went outside her house and saw this:

“Hmmmmm….weird” she thought.

Holly loves all God’s creatures. Holly thinks beavers are cute and have a reputation for being busy.

The next morning Holly went outside her home and saw this:

Legend: Pinkish Red circled “X”=trees felled by beaver(s)

Holly loves all God’s creatures. Holly thinks beavers are cute and are living up to their reputation for being busy.

The next morning Holly went outside her home and saw this:

Legend: Pinkish Red circled “X”=trees felled by beaver(s)

Holly loves all God’s creatures. Holly thinks beavers are cute and are really living up to their reputation for being busy.

The next morning Holly went outside her home and saw this:

Legend: Pinkish Red circled “X”=trees felled by beaver(s), Large fancy two-toned arrow emphasizes that a tree between Holly’s house and the street was also felled.

WHAT?

Holly has no problem with beaver activity as long as it is not interrupting her home’s landscape. There are plenty of trees around to share. Holly thinks the beaver(s) have gone too far.

Holly is mad.

Holly loves all God’s creatures except for beaver(s) who overstep their landscape boundries. Holly thinks most beavers are cute and live up to their reputation for being busy. Holly thinks a small minority of beavers are evil and out to ruin her landscape.

Holly makes a call to the beaver relocation program:

Soon a professional trapper arrives to put an end to the small minority of beavers who are evil and out to ruin Holly’s landscape.

The professional trapper sets two traps along the creek and one trap in the pond.

Holly made this handy dandy trap map for your reference:

Holly is so proud of herself for hiring a professional trapper to relocate the small minority of beavers who are evil and out to ruin her landscape.

She is so happy until she hears this:

Which causes Holly to say this:

Before the professional trapper leaves he gives Holly trapping lessons. Holly learns that any trapper worth her salt (and Holly is pretty sure she is worth the 75 cents that salt is worth) checks her traps early in the morning.

The next morning Holly goes out to check her traps around 6:30 am.

Holly is sleepy and just got out of bed.

Holly is still in her shorty pajamas. The one thing the professional trapper forgot to mention was the dresscode for beaver trapping:

Holly does put on her tall rubber snake fighting boots because Holly loves all God’s creatures except for beaver(s) who overstep their landscape boundries and snakes.

Holly sets out to check the traps along the creek. The trees are so thick that it is very difficult to walk.

The trees behind Holly’s house are very dense:

Holly finds that if she walks down the middle of the creek she can get to the two traps along the creek without fighting too many trees.

She finds that she trapped a turtle in the first trap.

She finds that she trapped a turtle in the second trap.

Holly is pretty sure that trapping turtles isn’t going to help her beaver problem.

Holly starts toward the third trap.

It is not along the creek.

It is very difficult to get to.

Holly fights through the trees and brush.

Holly is fighting through the trees and brush when she thinks she might hear a snake. Holly is not rational enough to assess that one usually doesn’t HEAR a snake.

Holly starts pushing and shoving through the trees and brush to the edge of the trees behind Holly’s house.

She is so frantic that she falls out of the woods:

Holly literally falls out of the woods behind her house onto the golf course that is behind the woods behind her house.

When she lands she is approximately 6 feet away from the ball of a early rising golfer.

She is 15 feet from his golf cart in which his partner is sitting.

She is 25 feet from another golf cart filled with the remainer of the early rising golf foursome.

To be fair, Holly is unsure of the five parties involved who was more startled.

Before running back into the woods to escape the early rising golfers, Holly said this:

Holly is suspicious that this little episode might have been told again once the foursome got back to the golf clubhouse.

Holly is a little suspicious that there might have been some laughing involved.

Holly is pretty sure they didn’t buy the beaver trapping story so she would like to post this in the clubhouse just to set things straight:

It is true that Holly did end up trapping 2 beavers, a racoon and 3 turtles. None of these fierce animals were hurt in anyway. The beavers and racoon were relocated to a more rural location. Unfortunately for Holly it didn’t happen overnight. Holly was just like Pa from Little House on the Prairie for 2 weeks.

Holly was very careful on all following beaver trapping trips to wear REAL clothes and listen very closely for snakes.

It was one of THOSE nights

Holly — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 11:35:52 +0000

It was already 20 minutes past bedtime.

All the baths were finished.

The boys were dry.

And pajama-ed.

The teeth were brushed.

The dirty clothes rested in the hamper.

The nightlights lit.

The proper blanket, teddy, pillow aligned.

And realigned.

Fresh water was arranged bedside.

Prayers were completed.

Questions were answered.

Genetic perseverance

Holly — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 11:50:33 +0000

There is one thing about my boys that I have to sometimes put in perspective.

They are persistent little people.

It is something that everyone who comes in contact with them notices. They just ooze perseverance. My mother-in-law says, “if you can just harness that power, those boys will go places”.

Using that force for good.

Not evil.

Right now they have harnessed that force to drive me insane.

The other night after they went to bed I made brownies. I packaged up the brownies into a see-through plastic container and set it on the kitchen counter. In the morning the boys tumbled down the stairs one by one…

Rhett(4) walked into the kitchen, noticed the brownies instantly and said, “Mommy, can I have brownies for breakfast?”

Ummmm…no.

Ryan(8) walked into the kitchen, noticed the brownies instantly and said, “Mommy, can I have brownies for breakfast?”

Ummmm…no.

I stepped into the room adjacent to the kitchen where I was out of their sight, but could still hear what the boys were saying.

Reid(6) walked into the kitchen, noticed the brownies instantly and said to his brothers, “I am going to ask mommy for brownies for breakfast!”

Ryan reported, “We already asked and it didn’t work”.

I moved back into the kitchen and guess what Reid asked me?

Can I have brownies for breakfast?

In the 8 years I have been a mother I have NEVER EVER EVER served brownies for breakfast. In the 4, 6 and 8 years they have been alive they have never had brownies for breakfast.

Bless their optimistic little hearts.

Suburban obsession uncovered

Holly — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 05:32:54 +0000

For the last few months Blog-Stedman and I have had a little obsession.

It might even be an addiction.

But since we both do it, we rationalize that it is OK.

Enablers.

When done well, it can cause an extreme high.

Yes, we admit we are playing Words with Friends on our iPhones…

Shhh….don’t tell Words with Friends that there is a really similar game called Scrabble except Scrabble doesn’t give 10 points for a “j”.

We started out just playing a game over a few days. Then play escalated. Soon we were playing 2, 3 even 4 games at a time. We found ourselves in the living room on opposite sides of the couch furiously playing each other. Silently…with a little trash talking.

One night we had a babysitter, went out to eat and played Words over gourmet pizza sitting across from each other in a booth.

Onlookers were probably frightened for our relationship.

We were staying even. He would win a game. I would win a game.

Then HE started 8 games.

8 games?

Yes, and I am here to report that 8 games can kill the joy.

He took it too far.

Oh the pressure of never catching up.

I lost the love of the game. I lost all 8 games.

I was talking to Shauna on the phone the other day and she mentioned that she and her husband had plans on Friday evening.

I asked what they were going to do and she answered tentatively, “go to our favorite hangout in Dallas…and play Words“.

Other people do that too?

Awesome.

Turns out that she and her husband have been playing against each other ever since she got her new phone.

When my husband found out that Shauna was playing Words he invited her to play a game.

*gasp*

Isn’t that almost like cheating? I mean, I am his WIFE.

This sudden addition of competition has caused me to perk up my play…

Calm may be overrated

Holly — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 22:24:24 +0000

Reid(6)…

Calm.

Sweet.

Creative.

Did I mention calm?

Being the mom of three boys is very similar to being a Rodeo clown.

You have no control over anything, but you are charged with assuring that rodeo participants don’t kill each other.

That is how it is around here. The boys are usually on top of each other. Reid is usually at the bottom. He plays possum until the other boys give up. Really, how much fun is it to wail on someone who isn’t fighting back?

Not that I haven’t promoted that technique to the other two…Reid is the only one to which it comes naturally.

Being the non-squeaky wheel in the house has it’s disadvantages – Reid is often overlooked.

He has been so consistently quiet that I started worrying about him starting about two years ago. I just had a feeling something MUST be wrong with him. I mean…he was quiet! I took him to the doctor and asked a lot of friends.

The consensus was he is just a low energy child.

I watched to make sure the low energy didn’t extend to being out of breath or other signs of medical issues. Nope. Everything seemed normal except he was calm.

Calm continued to worry me.

I watched as he often sat on the sidelines even though he is a very outgoing boy. I watched as he had concentration issues even though he seemed interested in what we were doing. Mostly, I just watched because something didn’t feel right.

Recently one of my good friends had her son tested for all sorts of food sensitivities. She had to cut his diet down to just a few foods. It was a huge pain. The whole family’s life was changed…but two weeks later she had a different boy.

I spoke to our doctor the last time we went and asked what he would suggest…what would he cut out first?

Milk.

Reid LIVES on milk. Milk at every meal. Milk as a snack.

He suggested we start with the lactose-free milk and see if it makes a difference. The first night I tried to sneak it in.

Mommy, this is SOY milk!

Oh, the horror. I had to tell him about the special milk and what we were going to try. He agreed and part of the decrease in milk intake over the last two weeks can be tracked back to his preference for regular milk.

Two weeks later he is a different child.

When he talks he dances.

When he picks up a book he reads.

When his brothers attack he fights.

It is an incredible transformation.

Except he is no longer calm and quiet.

Would it be wrong of me to sneak some real milk into his Lactaid just so I could catch a little peace?

Where I get all mushy and hug the internet

Holly — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 05:09:52 +0000

I have been blogging for 3 years and have had several occasions to meet bloggers in real life.

Every time has exceeded my expectations and created lifelong friendships, partnerships and just plain fun.

This weekend was like all those experiences on speed. Mom 2.0 was my first conference and I feel like Julie Andrews spinning in the Alps.

*without the guitar*

It started with a road trip to Houston with Laurie (Tip Junkie) in an anti-minivan vehicle provided by Chevy.

We were talking so fast and furious that we ended up drowning out OnStar driving directions which resulted in multiple re-calls to OnStar. We are pretty sure there was a collective sigh of relief in the OnStar information center when they saw that we finally reached our destination.

I knew Laurie and I were kindred spirits when we both ordered breakfast for lunch at a roadside Denny’s.

Laurie and I were rooming with Amy (Mom Spark), Jyl (Mom It Forward), Jenny (Jenny On the Spot), and Rachael (Today’s Mama) – not pictured.

Seriously, it doesn’t get much better than that.

But it does!

Because the halls, conference rooms, bathrooms, restaurants, elevators and bar were FILLED with bloggers. Bloggers who squealed in delight during introductions and hugged spontaneously.

I met several of my very favorite people in the world for the first time – Rachel, Cammie and Loralee.

As a cosmic sign of our bond, Cammie and I showed up on Friday for the conference DRESSED EXACTLY THE SAME…with NO prior arrangements.

Oh, and I declared my love for The Bloggess in person because who knows when that opportunity will arise again and it seemed slightly less creepy than my usual twitter declaration.

The Beet Jello was well received…if well is a relative term.

I really don’t think there is any question of my reigning chunky jello dominance.

The speakers were great. The round table discussions engaging. The access to really amazing, smart and influential people was incredible.

There was a lot of talking, card exchanging and hugging.

But what I loved the most was all the laughing…

chunky jello show down

Holly — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 17:09:20 +0000

Today I am packing to go to Mom 2.0 – WHOO HOO! I don’t get out much so this is a BIG deal.

I am packing my camera.

I am packing my laptop.

I am packing jello…

This is a container of my grandmother’s famous beet jello.

Yes, beet jello does exist. Oh, and while we are talking in italics…why is Holly taking beet jello to Mom 2.0?

It all started on #gno awhile back (December 22, 2009 to be exact)…

*insert wavy Scooby Doo lines with the doodly-doo sound effects*

In the midst of a jello conversation (don’t you just love Twitter?), Rachael at @Todaysmama mentioned that she had a superior chunky jello recipe.

I replied with the following boast:

To which she replied:

Was that a challenge?

Well, in a few hours Rachael will be on TEXAS soil and as a matter of Texas-chunky-jello-potlucking-pride I will be taking the game to her at Mom 2.0.

Yep, it is THAT serious.

So if you would like to play along at home (if you are at Mom 2.0, please stop by the jello suite…I will have extra spoons), here is the recipe:

Pineapple-Beet Salad Supreme

1 3 oz pkg. Strawberry Jello

1 3 oz pkg. Raspberry Jello

1 3 oz pkg. Cherry Jello

4 cups of boiling Water

1 can Shoestring-Style Beets

1 can Crushed Pineapple

1/2 cup Sweet Pickle Juice

Dissolve the jello in boiling water.

Drain beets and pineapple.

Add drained liquid and pickle juice to dissolved gelatin.

Chill til syrupy.

Stir in beets and pineapple.

Pour into 3 qt. mold and chill until firm.

Dressing - 1 cup mayo, 1 3 oz pkg. cream cheese, 1 TB dried celery, 1 2 oz can of pimento, 1 TB sweet pickle, 1 TB chop green onion

Combine the mayo, cream cheese, celery , pimento, pickle, and onion. Thin with light cream to desired consistency. Let stand several hours.

Unmold jello and serve with dressing

Serves 16-18

ENJOY!

Take that Utah.

Splashing around DFW

Holly — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 04:37:46 +0000

Yes, last week we were SNOWED in…

12 1/2 ” ya’ll!

C.R.A.Z.Y.

A few days later we are still shivering, but the snow is almost gone. It was so weird seeing SNOWBANKS in local shopping center parking lots.

Anyway, we are slowly thawing out and I am trying my best to segue into some WATER information.

Not messy spring thaw water…

But PUR.

*that was exceedingly smooth, wouldn’t you say?*

I have teamed up with PUR water for their Water on Wheels truck tour on it’s stop here in Dallas (it then goes on to Atlanta and Philadelphia). This traveling event has all sorts of family-friendly activities like a PUR Water Bar, Rock-Climbing Wall, Photos and Gear from the Summit on the Summit Climb and a PUR Water Taste Test Challenge.

PUR is also educating families about safety of drinking water and how they can help with the PUR program to improve water quality around the world:

Water is one of the basic elements of life. Yet, about 4,000 children in developing countries die every day from illness and disease related to unsafe drinking water.

–Many children in developing countries simply don’t have access to clean, safe water in their communities. With no running water, many families have no choice but to drink from rivers and streams contaminated with bacteria, parasites and viruses.
–In collaboration with the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), P&G developed a low-cost water purification technology, a powdered product that effectively reduces parasites, bacteria and other contaminants found in water.
–This program distributes water purification technology in the form of PUR packets, which are as small as a tea bag – each tiny packet can transform up to 10 liters of contaminated water into clean, purified water within minutes.
–To date, the program has provided more than 1.8 billion liters of clean drinking water to people in developing nations.

A portion of the proceeds from the sales of PUR water filtration systems are donated to help fund the program.

The Dallas Tour dates start this Friday in Plano and travel around North Texas until February 28 in Garland (come see me there!).

It is going to be a really fun series of events…

OH!

And they are doing a giveaway for a $400 gift card to Lowes along with 10 PUR water filtration pitchers!

WAY COOL.

Check out the PUR Water on Wheels Tour Giveaway and Dallas Tour dates on Burb Mom.

I am closing comments here so ya’ll can visit the giveaway and learn more about PUR…thanks so much!

My favorite Valentines

Holly — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 02:56:42 +0000

The first year Ryan was in school it didn’t occur to me until the night before Valentine’s Day that he would need Valentines for his classmates. Thankfully, I had an overflowing scrapbook supply closet (sorely neglected since I started blogging) and we pulled together 18 handmade Valentines and a decorated box for Valentine collection.

The following year I remembered a week early and while at the store with Ryan told him he could pick out any Valentines he wanted for his classmates.

But we ALWAYS make them!

And that is why my boys always take handmade Valentines to school. It was a tradition born of necessity.

I wanted to share a few of the REJECTED Valentines from Ryan’s first grade year. He and Reid were alone at the table laughing hysterically over this line of cards that never made it to school…

This was the popular “I love you but you steenk”.

Followed by the “I love you but you wer a diper”.

And who could forget the loving, “I love you but you poop”?

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!